Friday, January 4, 2008




I finally moved to Astoria. So now, this page should no longer be called A Bronx Tale. It should be called A Queens Tale, or it could be called a tale of automobile theft. Or even the tale of the long, drawn-out break-up. I now live on Steinway street with two cats and a dog. I had no idea C-Town could be so nice! Astoria isn't the Upper West Side. Its not completely sanitized. But it doesn't have quite the edge that my neighborhood had. I'm sad to say goodbye to the huge amount of space for 525 a month. Not so sad to be living in a better situation, where my belongings don't get stolen from the street in front of my house in the middle of the night. Glad to be living in a place with kitchen counters. A toilet that flushes the first time. Grunting middle-eastern hookah smoking men instead of an old grunting Italian couple ...okay, I'll call it even on that one. Goodbye Mayor and I'll miss the offers to help clean the cat pee out of my car. Goodbye Arthur Avenue market men who liked my dimples. Goodbye wine trellis, and tartufo and delicious house pinot grogio at my favorite trattoria. Goodbye $1 pizza dough at terra nova. Goodbye dog shit on the street. Goodbye Bronx.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Festival





Annual New York State Sheep and Wool Festival

A beautiful day in Rhinebeck, New York.

Two hours upstate from the City fall was in full force. Deep oranges, yellows and reds, with little green left. There was free cheese, wine, and olive oil samples and lots and lots of sheep. I've never seen such beautiful yarn. Unfortunately, most of the wool was not yet spun, begging browsers to buy one of the hand-made wooden spinning wheels. I bought one light blue skein of pure wool for felting, and he surprised me with a skein of turquoise that feels like it has silk woven in. I resisted the wheels and looms, but bought a cup of freshly pressed cider, swallowng the tangy mixture that tasted like autumn in my mouth.





Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Peaches and Magnolias

Tonight I try a new recipe, and it turns out remarkably well. When he gets home from work I suggest my idea I have been thinking about all day. After we are stuffed from dinner, we head towards the Trattoria for a glass of wine and dessert. Finally, formal celebration for my new job. These, the kinds of activities we will be able to do more of, instead of killing time doing temp work and searching for requirements on food stamp qualification. We walk down our narrow passage way towards the lit street behind our wrought-iron gate. It makes the familiar sounds on unlocking it and locking it again, firm sturdy sounds reminding us we are protected.

Outside our building on the street we realize what a perfect night it really is. The moon hangs in the middle of the sky, large and bright white. It isn't a moon out of a fairy tale, the kind that awes onlookers with its size or color, but it is beautiful. I have come to appreciate seeing the moon at all during this summer in the city, when it is more likely it will be blocked out by high-rise buildings or a new housing project across the street, or clouds, or pollution. Also, the air is breezy and perfect for a tank top, my bare arms aware of the feeling of the night. The small Italian woman who lives on the other side of our landlord's building stands in a floral housedress and speaks to a younger woman. We begin to pass by, holding hands and heading down the hill, saying good evening quietly so as not to disturb the conversation. When we have passed the women, we are called out to. "Do you like peaches?" the older woman asks. "Yes," I reply, laughing a little. I had my last peach for breakfast.

It is the answer to this question that seems to unlock a new world for us. We are introduced to the grown daughter, who tells us she used to live on the street where our college sits and now lives in Northern Westchester. She chats with us before she heads out while her mother goes back into her alcove to find peaches. The pretty leafy tree that grows against the fence on the street is a peach tree, and I am surprised that it grows here, in the Northeast, next to a parking lot and a cracked sidewalk. Next we are beckoned through the gate, and I see that behind the tree and the deep red roses that I had glimpsed before while passing are more plants, like tomatoes, and more flowers. She invites us into her garage and shows us where her husband and son make their own wine in a back room. Then we are offered seats on a little concrete patio.

The air is still cool and breezy, the trees and flowers darkly outlined against the sky and the white moon. To be polite, I try to make conversation. I find that I have a million questions for her. She answers them willingly, congenially. She has lived here since 1963. She was born in a small town, more like a village, in the middle of Italy. After the war she lived in Venezuela, and she speaks Spanish as well as Italian. She still calls it Italiano, and I notice a similarity between her speech and that of my landlords. While she is able to converse in English, she holds a heavy accent that is somehow comforting and familiar to me, although I have never even been to Italy.

It is a testament for the richness of the neighborhood, Belmont, that she has lived in this spot in the Bronx for this long and not even begun to shake her accent. It is thick to the point that I find myself leaning in, struggling to understand her. Sometimes I miss words, or even a whole phrase, and so I just nod and smile, something I learned to do long ago in the South. I see a black and white cat with its little face pressed against the window. Soon another cat appears on the concrete wall above the garage. She tells us it belongs to the neighbor above and calls it a long silly name in Italian beginning in a G. She tells it to me several times, but still, it is lost on me.

I remark on the beauty of her garden, this little Oasis in the middle of the city. She shows us the tree behind us, and when I look closer I realize it is a Magnolia tree, something I didn't even know grew outside of the South. Instead of a white blossom, the only kind I have ever seen, it has a large pink flower, darker at the center and lightening towards the edge of the petals. She goes to the tree and breaks it off, bringing it to me. It is so thick, so tough and leathery, but delicate also, and it carries a beautiful smell. Then she says something about the seeds of a flower blowing, and taking root in the brick. I wonder what she means, but when we turn around we see that her potted flowers, simple things like impatiens, have spread their seed and large flowers have begun growing in the space between the brick wall and the asphalt driveway.

We excuse ourselves, thanking her profusely for the peaches and the conversation. We continue towards the Tratorria, and take a seat outside on the street. I order a glass of red wine, he orders the sweet white I had on my birthday. He orders chocolate ice cream, I have the tartufo, which is rich and delicious with a single cherry in the middle. When we return home, I set the peaches on the windowsill and hope they will begin to ripen from the bit of sun that comes through our gate and up the passage way.

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Bronx Zoo


Going to the zoo alone is a humbling experience. The Bronx Zoo on Wednesday (free day) in the middle of the summer is chaos, a swirling pool of people, colors, languages, screaming children, food, drink, and animal smells. I walked the few blocks to the park at about 2:30 in the afternoon to avoid being overwhelmed, and on entering the gate my first sensation was of being overwhelmed by the heat, the number of people pushing past me to exit, and the sheer size of the place.

Every exhibit I went to seemed like a study on children. By a food stand there were children gently tugging at mother's sleeve, saying, "Momma, I want ice cream." In front of the peacocks there was a little girl telling her brother that they are not people and that's why we call them female and male, female for the girl and male for the boy. I caught myself laughing and she looked up at me innocently. I smiled and nodded, to reassure her that yes, that was correct. Then she smiled back, proudly. When being privy to such intimacy between children and other children and children and their parents, the solo zoo visitor seems to have limited choices. One, to be the anti-social animal viewer, the person who came to the zoo for the singular purpose of seeing the animals and is loathe to be detered from this quest. The animals are the focus of every encounter, and the screaming children and large families only get in the way of sightings.

Then there is the lonely zoo visitor, generally an older person, but not necessarily excluded by youth itself. This person gazes at the animals wistfully, but is really focused on the possibility of human interaction. Objects dropped from tiny hands, little ones running ahead of their parents but unable to locate the cheetah hidden in the grass, kids at picnic tables waiting for their parents to come back bearing checkered paper containers of chicken fingers and french fries that will be half uneaten: these are all excuses for human interaction between a stranger and youth itself.


As I approach the bears I like to think of myself as situated somewhere in between these two extremes. It's not that I have no one to go to the zoo with, its just that I have no one to go with at this very time on this day and have decided to seize the moment myself. I could have waited until the weekend and gone with a lover and a few friends. I could have called a distant friend I have no desire to see and within an hour had a smiling face beside me, all pleasantries and feigned excitement. But I am alone, and seeing animals alone is close to pointless. The small pleasure they arouse quietly in a person is multiplied by exclaiming about beauty or cuteness or size or height to the person accompanying you. And without this, I am left to point out a bear on a hill to a small child who cannot see it. I do not go looking for every human interaction that I can locate, but I find that a small moment with a child is about equal to a very spotted cheetah or a striped antelope I have never seen before.


At the Baboon Cafe I sit alone and eat a three dollar cup of ice cream and drink a three dollar cherry Pepsi. I listen to an Indian family with a three little girls talking, and once the little girl sees my ice cream she can't get her own soon enough. She tells her mother she wants strawberry, and her mother looks at me uncertainly. I shake my head and smile. "They only have chocolate, vanilla, and twist," I tell her. Twist becomes "mix" in her grasping English, and I leave with my drink to walk towards the exit of the park. I have begun to feel ghost-like, only existing as strollers awkwardly bump against me or children speak to me, or my knowledge of the zoo food menu is helpful to a family. I only have fifteen minutes left before the park closes and I head towards more animal exhibits. I don't have enough time for the Mouse House, but I approach the monkey cages. On the cage in front of me is a sign that reads, "We have a new baby!" and I look up to find a tiny baby monkey clinging to the back of its mother. It's precious little face warms my heart and the sign explains it is still too young for the staff to know whether it is a male or female. It receeds into the cage as two boys run up to the cage, pointing, and scream "Monkeys!" I wonder at the origin of this obnoxious and obvious behavior before I see the adults doing the same thing. I tell the boys to be quiet, that they're scaring the baby and it's mother away. When their sister approaches they, in turn, hush her.

Soon more kids and adults approach, pointing like monkeys themselves, loudly naming the animals that are right in front of them.
I check the time and see that it is 4:58 and head towards the exit of the zoo. I get caught up in the mob of women with strollers, the Puerto Rican Chulo shirts, the large zoo collector's cups with wolf heads on them, and head outside. I feel relieved that I did something today, and even more relieved that I can walk the few blocks home alone, back towards my air-conditioned apartment where the only creatures around are my two cats.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Terra Nova




Today I walked around the corner to wash some shirts at the laundromat. I met the Laundry Queen, who is said to impart her disguised wisdom in the crudest ways possible. When she saw a pair of underwear on the floor she exclaimed, "Someone dropped their drawers," and one woman answered, "Them drawers are too small to be mine. I wear an extra-large." The laundry queen responded, "Girl, don't even go there." I stood outside eating a cherry popsicle with an Italian man who has lived in the neighborhood since 1953 and his wife from West Virginia near the Ohio border who has lived in Little Italy for 30 years.


We talked about all kinds of things, from the names common in West Virginia- - double girl names, like Deborah Lynn. They told me about the best bakery in the neighborhood, called Terra Nova, or new earth. I think about a poetry collection I once read, I think by Louise Gluck, called the same. Apparently they bake fresh bread that melts in your mouth and sell premade pizza dough for 65 cents. I also got a recommendation for a hair salon to get my hair cut: Lucy's, down Arthur Avenue, for $15. I told them I was worried I wouldn't be able to find a place that could cut white people's hair (like in Ghana) and they told me, no, there aren't any "chop shops" around here. They told me I need to go to the Bronx Zoo, and I myself can't believe I still haven't been. Wednesday is free, so with the help of these new friends I decided tomorrow I will go to get my haircut and then walk to the Zoo, cornered at the main road. The chili dogs and cheese fries both came highly recommended to me.



If I were going to write an essay about today I would describe the rich unsweetened taste of my
whole fruit popsicle, a shade of mauve lipstick. I would capture the dialogue of the Laundromat Queen, and somehow bottle the burning smell of my clothes when they are finally dry. I would mark the temperature, note the summer heat lacking humidity, remarkable for late July in New York. Most of all, I would write about my own terra nova, this new place on which I've put my feet, clad in low heels, or business-sensible flats, or barefoot on recycled carpet. I would describe myself, unsure and uncertain, standing on terra nova so strange and different I cannot even feel the dirt or grass beneath my toes.



http://www.terranovabakery.com http://www.bronxzoo.com